The Role of Church Leaders in Pornography Recovery

Pastor George had lost track of how often Nelson had been in his office over the last 15-plus years. It was always the same issue. Nelson would seem okay for a while but would inevitably return to his old behaviour. Sometimes it lasted as long as a few months, and sometimes just a few hours, but he never quite seemed to exit his cycle of pornography use.

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There were a couple of times, when Nelson hadn't used pornography for over six months, that both Pastor George and Nelson were convinced that Nelson’s pornography use was a thing of the past. Starting to realise how many others were also battling in this area, Nelson was presented with an opportunity to testify of his victory. The testimony went well but, sadly, it was not long before Nelson returned to his old behaviour.

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Although a leader in the church, Nelson’s behaviour of late was becoming concerning. He was more self-absorbed in general and more distracted when he was in meetings but, more often than not, he seemed to be making a habit of excusing himself from meetings. Nelson denied that he was using pornography again, but Pastor George remained unconvinced.

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Pastor George seemed stumped. Nelson’s pornography use, when he had last opened up in counselling, seemed to be escalating. Where initially, Nelson avoided certain genres of pornography, he admitted to watching content that was completely contrary to his values and had even started acting out with voyeuristic behaviours. In his last session with Pastor George session, Nelson sheepishly confessed that he had recently paid for a “full body massage,” something he would never previously have done.

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Not only was Pastor George feeling overwhelmed about Nelson’s situation. The number of people who were opening up to him and to his church leaders about similar struggles was escalating dramatically. This included ladies, elderly men, teenagers, and young children. Recently, two of his leaders, a youth pastor and a worship leader, had opened up about their struggles with pornography. Many of his church leaders were looking to Pastor George for guidance as to how to help.

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While Pastor George knew that it was commendable that people in his church felt safe enough to be vulnerable in this area, he had no idea how to help effectively. His previous attempts had limited and temporary success. He had recommended inner healing, marriage therapy, breaking generational ties, seeking professional counselling, and attending selected short-term programmes that were 3 times a year. While, for a small number of people there was a measure of success, he realised something more substantial and that lead to sustainable success was needed.

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Simply hoping for a “zap from heaven”  or a spiritual “download” that would instantly change every person was unrealistic. While Pastor George had heard of situations where some people had been instantly delivered from pornography use, this was not common. It seemed that the intentional process of learning how to walk in freedom contributed significantly to healthy character formation.

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Pastor George decided to do some of his own research into the issue of pornography use in the church, first looking at statistics, and then at the impact of pornography use. What he found made him more determined to stay true to his calling to open the eyes of the blind, to bring release to those in captivity, and to heal the broken-hearted.

Statistics show that 69% of pastors say pornography has adversely impacted the church while only 7% say they have a programme to help those struggling with pornography.^[1]

Realising that there was a possibility that more than half of his congregation could be using pornography regularly, his biggest shock centred around those he considered future church leaders. Three-quarters of Generation Z were found to be using pornography at least monthly, with a minimal difference between male and female usage.^[2]

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Pastor George decided that enough was enough. It was time to change the statistics. He was encouraged to see he was not alone.

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The Urgent Need to Address Pornography Addiction in the Church

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Maybe you can identify with Pastor George. You are seeing that the issue of problematic and compulsive pornography use by the church can no longer be ignored. What has been termed the porndemic, or pornography pandemic, like any pandemic, will not just disappear if left unattended but will continue to fester and infiltrate the very institution that has been called to be a positive influence.

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It is not just churches that are showing a growing concern about the impact of pornography use. 17 American states have documented pornography as a public health crisis, because of the harm done to both the user of and the actors in pornography. Well-documented concerns range from the link between pornography use and addictive behaviours to the link between pornography and sex trafficking.

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The Inevitable Exposure to Pornography and Challenges for the Church

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David Amsden, writer for the New York Times, called pornography the wallpaper of the world. He identified that exposure to pornography is no longer optional, it is inevitable. Pornography, any media created or used for the sake of sexual arousal, is very pervasive. This includes TV series, movies, music videos and lyrics, social media platforms, novels, billboards and virtual reality video games.

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Because of the increasing normalisation of pornography use by the media, many believe that “everybody is watching it” thereby minimising its negative impact. However, the compulsive use of pornography, as evidenced by someone unable to stop or control their use, can cause marked distress and significant impairment in personal, social, occupational, and spiritual areas of functioning.^[3]

Do not let the world around you squeeze you into its mould, but let God remould your minds from within...

Romans 12:2a Phillips

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The church is called to bring the light and power of God’s kingdom into dark and hopeless arenas, and this includes the area of pornography use. If we are not speaking about the issue and impact of pornography use, we are culturally irrelevant. If we are not providing sustainable solutions for those caught in compulsive pornography use, we may become spiritually impotent. 

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Vantage - A Christ-Centered Solution for Pornography Recovery

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Vantage is a cutting-edge pornography recovery programme developed in response to the call for an evidence-based, Christ-centered, life-giving and resolution-orientated approach to overcoming the problematic and compulsive use of pornography.

Recovery is about moving beyond a daily struggle to try and maintain our sobriety.

It is about changing perspectives and shifting paradigms in order to adjust our viewpoint. As this happens, we are able to see with greater clarity, to gain a more informed direction, and to make healthier decisions through life.

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Abstaining from pornography use is simply the start of the journey of recovery; a radical lifestyle change is also required. By embracing and applying radical recovery principles and practices, recovery can be both empowered and sustained leading, with time, to a complete transformation of character.

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In addition, accurate knowledge is imperative if we are hoping to effectively change our perspectives. Ephesians 4 encourages us to take off the old and to change the way we think (the spirit of our minds) before putting on the new. Too often we try to take off the old and put on the new without changing the way we think. This approach is unable to sustain change of any sort.

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The Vantage programme leads us through a journey of shifting paradigms (ways of viewing the world) by providing up-to-date content, relevant reflection opportunities and practical application strategies. Only by gaining an accurate understanding of the extensive impact of pornography use can we increase our motivation to change. And, only by improving our self-awareness are we able to open our eyes to and accept the need for change.

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Healing happens in community: Using groupwork to overcome pornography addiction

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For maximum efficacy, we recommend that Vantage be facilitated in a closed group format with trained facilitators. Groupwork, although not a recent development, is still recognised as cutting-edge therapy for those battling dysfunctional and addictive behaviours. This includes the problematic and compulsive use of pornography.   

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A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.‍

Ecclesiastes 4:12 NIV

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The tendency to isolate, because of the compounding shame associated with pornography use and because of living a double life, is often found in those using pornography compulsively. For the most part, pornography use is an isolating activity and can serve as a place of escape from the realities of life. Groupwork is powerful in countering this shame and tendency to isolate along with the flawed beliefs and thinking patterns that have led to and/or resulted from continuing pornography use. For this reason, where possible, we also encourage individuals in the Vantage programme to attend other Addiction Recovery Groups to gain access to the greater recovery community and a wealth of resources.

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Empower Hope and Healing - Implement the Vantage Programme in Your Church

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If you, as a church, feel compelled to change the statistics, to bring light to the darkness, to be the hope of the world, and to set the captive free from pornography use, sign up to facilitate Vantage here.  We would love to empower you to do just that by providing you and/or selected members of your leadership team with the understanding, skills and resources that you need.

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As James 5:19-20 (MSG) says,

‍“My dear friends, if you know people who have wandered off from God’s truth, don’t write them off. Go after them. Get them back and you will have rescued precious lives from destruction and prevented an epidemic of wandering away from God.”

At Project Exodus, our heart is to make this journey of going after others and getting them back from pornography use as accessible and as effective as possible for you. The Vantage Pornography Recovery Programme stands out by combining evidence-based recovery methods with Christ-centered, life-giving principles. It not only focuses on abstinence but also on transforming character and renewing the mind. Read more about the benefits of Vantage and how to get started.

^{[1] https://baptistnews.com/article/the-ongoing-epidemic-of-pornography-in-the-church/ [Accessed 27 June 2024]}

^{[2] https://www.josh.org/the-porn-epidemic-problem-consequence-and-hope/ [Accessed 27 June 2024]}

^{[3] https://icd.who.int/browse/2024-01/mms/en#1630268048 [Accessed 27 June 2024]}